self esteem. an elusive and hard to corral wild beast of a bird. such is the case if one does not possess the inner road map that leads you to the ability to rest your being upon its soft color filled wings. and what she warrior is birthed with the jewel called self esteem in her heart? apparently all of us and let's define it as self love. from beyond time, did not the almightly whisper to us "i formed you, i fashioned you. you are mine. and i love what is mine." so we can conclude that the highest form of love roams within us from before the beginning. and, hence, shouldn't such a beautifully blended love letter be enough to lead us into the ocean of loving oneself. if the creator of all and all and everything's thing love's us, we should follow suit. comon sensical thinking. nevertheless, many feminine of this world know that for a long yard while of our lives such words take up residence only within our ear drums. sitting and travelling no further. unable to muster up the courage of flight. and this reticence leaves us with a choice: stay inside a slow death of unknowing the known of love or leap with no expectation of landing into knowing the known of love. free will.
life. well it has its way of choosing around your fear. so does the divine. thankfully. eventually that rare treasure of love happens upon us through the course of traversing up and down (and sideways back again) the dusty streets of life. and eventually, eventually, we spy it and are invited to stroke its back in joy. we are lucky. for this reason: as we run, twirl, frolick within life's ticks and tocks, the divine bequeaths to us sista friends who take on the mantle of holding you up until you determine that your being is going to grab a hold of love's brass ring. these beauties are there for you until, and even after, you see your way fit to hug loveliness. until and even after.
sista friends. they are the stuff that gorgeous-ness is made of: mosaics and recipes of love. if you lift up the lid and peer into their souls you will find quite a mixture: tell you off in a minute mouths, hold you when your man acts up arms (and when you act up, truth be told..), feed you when you only have saltines and mustard hands, and give your weary head a place to rest mentalities. and the ultimate: they often send their joy your way because they know that on your own joy is having a heck of a time getting an audience with your spirit. selah.
ah yes. sista friends. they are a state of mind and to be found all over the globe. even in far away places such as australia. i found such beautiful treasures in that land. my second home referred to as the land down under. or as one of the first white settlers called it: terra australis del espiritu santu. in english: the great south land of the holy spirit. to aborigines it is the land of the dreaming. for aborigines the dreaming is when their ancestral beings moved across the land and created life and significant geographic features. dreaming stories pass on important knowledge, cultural values and belief systems to later generations. through song, dance, painting and storytelling which express the dreaming stories, aborigines have maintained a link with the dreaming from ancient times to today, creating a rich cultural heritage.**
so, i felt extremely lucky to have the divine bring me to such a land to live. filled with the spirit, the dreaming, cutural richness, storytelling, dance and song. yes, i loved (love) that land. and it loved (loves) me back. it can only be considered a blessing of massive proportions to count amongst my very own gaggle of sista friends some amazingly wise aborginal women. i felt informed and molded by their zest for life and love. they taught me. i listened. i felt a great connection. like a braided rope of eternity. our generational lines had much in common. many were the progeny and echoes of rape. my own american ancestry screams from the core of the earth that very same wail. they come from the tree of oppression and subjugation. strange fruit. it knows the name of my people too. and their blood knew something about suffering under the "curse" of you are denied, not seen, not heard, and just go over there and shut your mouth chile cus you are worthless (worth less...). oooo wee! now, i know my momma's momma's momma knew something of such things. yes, she sho' nuff did. once, i heard her tell me about it all in a dream. like a warning. trying to help me to wade through the muck until i could learn how to stir the waters.
these aborginal sista friends understood. and they began to teach me the goodness of me. they started me on a "journey of me" and i began to discover something important. simply this: i am enough. they spoke into my life the things of inner peace and grabbed me by the arm, setting me firmly on a course of healing. through their sweet songs and joyous dance. my feet learned a new kind of strength move. release. and my vocal chords sang out the songs of their heritage and culture. it is said that the word rapha, in hebrew, means to mend, to stitch. i believe it because it seemed that the almighty jehovah rapha was patiently, through creativity and love, teaching my heart that it was okay to be free from hurt. i was learning. yes, these brown sista friends from another terra were fascinating. indeed.
i must admit, however, that their words of peace and of being enough took years to sink in. i was a hard nut to crack. all anxiety dabbed in fear. but they were relentless. patient. like neverending drips of water upon a rock. eventually it bursts open. eventually i burst open. love. it gets you every time. years later i have learned to sit still, to be at peace, and to tap into the divine. i am still learning that i am enough. i am much closer to a fuller realization of this, however. and, i believe once my spirit grabs onto the notion that God is enough...i will be off and running.
many things i don't know. but one that i do know is this: anytime the almighty walks beauty onto your path...you always come out on the winning side. your very being awakens to the possibility of your own spirit swimming in the same warmth. and beyond.
so, dance a little, sing alot. hold on because he is doing a new thing. in you.
its all a matter of love and that is the what's what of sista friends.
selah.
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**information on the dreaming via: www.cultureandrecreation.gov.au
