#lovedmeright

u failed to dress your feet with courage and walk by my side. stood mid road as i spun out in a dirt deep ditch perfect God sent blistering storm. It left me at not. naught. I blueprinted my way thru those dark terrain-ed years. inch by inch. and with my healing pen. paper. poetic-ed me whole.

all the blue while you picked the journey of prudence. believing it easier to not align with one or t'other. it was never about either or. it was just about love. you failed. coward. you.

and yet, i still prayed for you. your life. to abound with goodness. your needs, desires. met without hesitation. i experienced spiritual hit after hit on your behalf. stood in the gap. so that the darkness wouldn't alight on you. it blasted me instead. increasing my own life hurricane. you never even considered that notion. i am sure. selfish.

i learned later, while looking back, that this is the mosaic of the strength of courage, faith and love. at its core. take a note and chew on it until it becomes honey on your tongue.

so now the sun speaks out its rays again upon the beauty of my heart. seem'd like you could smell the joy raising up. even from far afar. because there you were again. all of the sudden. in an instant. calling out to me.

the choice is now mine. and I choose me. my life, my passion, my giftings. you see - i have been loosed. into freedom. and i accepted the dance called life. in peace.

i don't hate. or despise. i just don't hold the desire to twirl you back inside my circle of love. you are a slinky. not the wonderful wonderful toy kind. but the kind that springs away in a leap to join with and in and around the sound of nasty tinged chorused voices spitting out in unity. against.

so no. dear (whatever, whomever, whereever) this part of my journey - the days filled with joy - you cannot join. no partaking.

you will have to peer over the horizon from afar. i will be there. am there. here! standing in the middle of fulfillment. twirled on my righted destiny. it was always meant to be. so, recognize.

i. am. healed by the love of the many.
blessed by the Eternal.

 #iamnolongeratwarwithlove

inspired by the song Battle Scars by Guy Sebastian and Lupe Fiasco